Damzy
NIGERIA & ACROBATIC CHRISTIANITY
7:02 AM
There's something about us Nigerian Christians that you
can't help but ponder.
We represent a rare breed of
hypocritical piety, spiritual respite and most of all, stellar reliance on God.
Some have been conditioned to believe that everything good and bad could only
have been from God. You hear stories of blood, corruption, violence,
kidnapping, and wars and still hear some Christians tell you it's the
"will of God".
My goodness!
Yes! God asked some people to sell
off millions of tons of dates (dabino) given to Nigeria by the Saudi Arabian
government for the purpose of feeding the IDPs, God triggered armed robbers to
shoot down the Zenith Bank branch in Owerri, God motivates ISIS and Boko Haram,
it's God's will that you marry a man that beats and squeezes life out of you
like tie and dye material.
Yes! God this and God that.
Sometimes, I just wonder what God
thinks of us Nigerian Christians, especially when we beseech Him for the
silliest and most unintelligent requests. The other day when a building beside
the MFM zonal HQ in Lekki was engulfed in flames, you had scores of people
invoke the Holy Ghost fire to perhaps "consume" the fire. I mean,
imagine the sophistry in fighting fire with fire? Meanwhile, you had firemen
and neighborhood residents work their lives out to ensure people were rescued
from London's Grenfell tower. As of now, more than 30 deaths have been recorded
but imagine if that had happened in Nigeria, like one of the high-rise 1004
buildings for example? Of course, God forbid. Our brand of Christianity
encourages us to forbid anything and everything instead of enacting strategies
that will allow us effectively manages such occurrences.
When are we going to let the Holy Ghost fire rest for once?
Well, that spiritual conversation
called prayer is one thing I also find astounding. If a pacifist were to
request a reason to convert to Christianity, I'm pretty sure they will pass off
the experience the moment they hear some of us pray. In our quest for divine
uplift, we've become spiritually barbaric. It's the reason why the average
Christian wants his "enemies" to die by fire and thunder. Such
resentment for a fellow man is the reason why many atheists and agnostics
sublimely believe Christianity encourages hatred and confusion. Jesus Christ
preached love but you, mortal Christian, feel it's only reasonable that people
(your enemies) die instead. Joseph, Job, Paul all suffered painful ordeals but
not once did they wishes death upon enemies. So, what's your own problem
exactly?
You want to win a contract, Holy
Ghost fire. You see a rat crawl under your bed, Holy Ghost fire. You want to
pass an exam or get a job; it's this same Holy Ghost fire. There's no telling
how unserious the Holy Ghost knows we Nigerian Christians are and I'm sure it's
why some feel their prayers aren't being answered. Wait a minute; if Dino
Melaye were to invoke Holy Ghost fire on his "enemies", do you think
many would be alive today?
Some have even been conditioned to
think that animals are conduits of satanic machinations. It's the reason why
you may never find a cat in a Nigerian household, especially Yórùbà and Igbo.
If you want to trigger mass heart attack, carry a pet black cat with you to a
typical Yórùbà woman's home at night and watch her piss in her pants. Some of
us even believe animals "eat our destiny". You hear prayer points
like, "every Python, every anaconda, and every locust eating away my
success, I command you to die by fire!"
Something is wrong with you but you have nobody to tell you.
How many of you remember The Lord's
Prayer? Well, I can confidently tell you the prayer contains all the
requirements for a spiritual engagement with God Almighty. No? Then let's
dissect it:
"Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name,
thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven..."
- This part denotes total reverence for God's overarching
supremacy and our total submission to Him
"Give us this day our daily bread..."
- Your daily bread comes in form of a job, contract, spouse,
appointment, gift or success of any kind
"And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who
trespass against us..."
- That’s you acknowledging your sins and begging for God's
pardon upon you and by extension, your "enemies" or evildoers
"And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from
all evil. Amen"
Now tell me, what more do we want from God?
Why are we running mad in order to stay sane?
Until we fix ourselves, we may never be able to fix many
things.
Damzy.
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