CONDUCTOR: Yezzz...owo da n beyen (Yezzz, your money there)

PASSENGER 1: Mo n bo, e sha farabale (I'm coming, just cool down)

CONDUCTOR: *arranges his stack of cash in no particular order, putting 100 naira before 500 naira and 20 naira before 1000 naira*

PASSENGER 2: *pokes the conductor on the left side of the belly, jolting him* Gimme my change

CONDUCTOR: Oga wetin dey worry you? you wan wound me ni? I don tell you sey I never get change, you come dey push me lai dat

PASSENGER 2: You must be stupid! Who do you think you are? Why are you raising your voice?

CONDUCTOR: Why you sef push me? I dey carry your money run? Oloshi leleyi sha

DRIVER: *looks back to see who's tormenting the conductor* Ewo ni weyrey laaro kutukutu gan (what's the madness this early morning?)

PASSENGER 2: if you people are not careful, I'll "introduce" some problems in your life. I'll treat you people like the criminals that you are

PASSENGER 3: Oga please it's okay.

ME: *at that point, I began to wish the lousy Passenger 2 could be taught a lesson. Meanwhile, I start documenting the bus tales as quickly as I can*

CONDUCTOR: Whoa! Ti a ba ti de bus stop, iya e ma sare ri ran wo (Look, when we get to the bus stop, your mother will quickly watch film)

*about 15 minutes later - now at the bus stop*

PASSENGER 2: *gets off the bus and asks for his change again*

CONDUCTOR: *nudges passenger 2 in the chest, tilting him backwards* Maa na iya e pa leni (I'll beat your mother to death today)

PASSENGER 2: What is the meaning of this?

CONDUCTOR: *hurries off to fetch an object and returns in a rage, eluding onlookers who make to restrict him from attacking passenger 2*

ONLOOKERS: Hah! O ma pa o, E mu dani o (he will kill him o, hold him o)

PASSENGER 2: Don't let the devil use you. I'm your brother. We are brothers. We are brothers. Please ..... (as he takes cover behind some men).......


Well, Passenger 2 survived the assault, and without collecting his change of course.

Some of you only know how to make mouth without realizing that not everybody is your mate.

The thing even pain me, the conductor for chook am small, make him carry souvenir go house.

Impotent man.